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Thursday, August 30, 2007

Reason why never visit a 5 * Hotel

Reason w hy never visit a 5 * Hotel

Question : " What would you like to have ..Fruit juice, Soda, Tea, Chocolate, Milo, or Coffee?"

Answer: " tea please "

Question : " Ceylon tea, Herbal tea, Bush tea, Honey bush tea, Ice tea or green tea ?"

Answer : "Ceylon tea "

Question : "How would you like it ? Black or white ?"


Answer: "white"

Question: " Milk, Whitener, or Condensed milk ? "

Answer: "With milk "

Question: "Goat milk, Camel milk or cow milk"

Answer: "With cow milk please.

Question: " Milk from Freeze land cow or Afrikaner cow?"

Answer: " Um, I'll take it black. "

Question: " Would you like it with sweetener, sugar or honey? "

Answer: "With sugar"

Question: " Beet sugar or cane sugar ?"

Answer: "Cane sugar "

Question:" White , brown or yellow sugar ?"

Answer: "Forget about tea just give me a glass of water instead."

Question: "Mineral water or still water ? "

Answer: "Mineral water"

Question: "Flavored or non-flavored ?"

Answer: " I'll rather die of thirst

God and your Manager....

GOD :

One day a man was having a conversation with God when his whole life flashed before his eyes as a series of footsteps on the sands of time. He saw that there were two pairs of footprints, but during the most difficult periods of his life there were only one set of footprints. He asked God "You said you will be with me throughout this journey, but why have you deserted me during the most critical times of my life??" to which God answered "Son, I did not desert you, I was always with you...you see only one set of footprints because during those difficult times in your life, I was carrying you in my hands"

MANAGER :

Another day I was having a similar conversation with my Manager when my whole project flashed before my eyes as a series of footsteps on the sands of time. I saw that there were two pairs of footprints, but during the most difficult times in the project there were only one set of footprints. I asked my Manager "You said you will be with me throughout the project, but why have you deserted me during the most critical times of the project??" to which the Manager answered " Dear, I did not desert you, I was always with you...you see only one set of footprints because during those difficult times, I was sitting on your head!!"

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

A Day in Stunt City

THE GOAL OF YOGA

All other activities are restrained and the mind is kept steady in Siva. This
is succinctly called Yoga. It is of five types : Mantrayoga, Sparsayoga,Bhavayoga, Abhavayoga and Mahayoga which is greater than everything.
The concentration of the mind without disturbances, on the expressed meaning
of the mantra along with the practice of the mantra is mantrayoga.Coupled with Pranayama the same is called sparsayoga. Without the contact of Mantra, it is Bhavayoga.

Wherein the universe with all its parts is meditated upon it is called Abhavayoga since in that the existent object is not seen. Wherein the nature of Siva is contemplated without any conditioning or restricting factor, the concentration of the mind on Siva is called Mahayoga. In this Yoga only he is authorised whose mind is detached from the perceived and Veda-ordained objects of pleasure.The mind is detached only on perceiving the defects in the objects and in the
attributes of the lord, perpetually.

In brief the Yoga is of eight or six ancillaries. The eight ancillaries are
Yama, Niyama, Asana Pranayama, Pratyahara, Dharana, Dhyana and Samadhi as
mentioned by the wise.

The six Angas are in brief Asana, Pranasamrodha, Pratyahara, Dharana, Dhyana
and Samadhi.

The definitions of all these separately have been mentioned in Sivasastra and
other Saivite scriptures, especially Kamika etc. They are mentioned in
Yogasastras and Puranas also. Yama is the observance of restraints such as
non-violence, non-stealing, abstention from sexual intercourse and non-
acceptance of monetary gifts.

The five constitute the subdivisions of Yama.

Niyama is the positive curb or restraint with the following fire subdivisions-
purity, contentment, penance, japa and attentiveness.

Asana is the Yogic pose and is of eight types such as Svastika, Padma,
Ardhendu, Vira, Yoga, Prasadhita, Paryanka and Yathesta.

Prana is the vital breath in the body. Ayama is checking. Hence Pranayama
means checking or restraining the breath. It is of three forms-Recaka, Puraka
and Kumbhaka.
One of the nostrils is pressed with the finger and the air from the belly is
let out through the other. This is Recaka (Exhaling).
Then through the other nostril the external air is inhaled and the body is
filled up like the bellows. It is Puraka (Inhaling).
He does not breathe out the internal or breathe in the external air. He
remains steady like the filled-up jar. It is called Kumbhaka (Retention).
The three, Recaka etc. shall not be done hurriedly or slowly. The practiser of
Yoga shall adopt them gradually with restraint.
The practice of Recaka shall begin with the purification of the veins and
conclude with its voluntary exit as mentioned in the Yoganusasana.
Pranayama is one of the four varieties in view of the time-units, Kanyaka etc.
Kanyaka is without Udghata (strokes). Its duration is twelve Matras. Madhyama
has two strokes, its duration is twentyfour Mantras.
Uttama has three strokes and its duration is thirty-six Matras. Uttara is the
Pranayama that causes perspiration and trembling of the body.
The yogin has experiences-the thrill of bliss, horripilation and shedding of
tears. He may prattle. There may be vertigo and senselessness.
Matra is the unit of time required for the snapping of the fingers after
moving them round the knees neither speedily nor slowly.
The duration of Pranayama shall be increased in accordance with the Matras and
strokes. The veins shall be necessarily purified.
The Pranayama is again twofold : Agarbha and Sagarbha. Restraining the breath
without mediation and Japa in called Agarbha Pranayama. If they too are
included it is called Sagarbha.
The Sagarbha Pranayama is hundred times more efficacious than the Agarbha.
Yogins practise Sagarbha Pranayama.
The vital breaths of the body can be conquered through the mastery over Prana.
The vital breaths are Prana, Apana, Samana, Udana, Vyana, Naga, Kurma, Krkara,
Devadatta and Dhananjaya. That which causes the movement is called Prana.
Apana is the vital air that takes the food lower down. Vyana is diffused
through the limbs and it develops them.
Udana is the vital air that affects the vulnerable points in the body among
the limbs. The vital air that spreads equally is called Samana.
The vital air Naga is for the activity of belching. Kurma is for the activity
of closing the eyes; the vital air Krkara is the activity of sneezing and the
vital air Devadatta is the activity of yawning.
Dhananjaya is the vital air that circulates through the body. It does not
leave off even the dead body. Gradually practised, Pranayama is very
efficacious.
It burns off all defects. It preserves the body of practisers. When the
Prana is mastered the symptoms are manifest.
Urine, phlegm and faeces are reduced in quantity. Ability to eat much and to
breathe slowly, lightness of the body, ability to walk fast, enthusiasm,
clearness of voice and tone, destruction of ailments, strength, brilliance,
comeliness of features, courage, intelligence, youthfulness, firmness and all
round pleasure these are the symptoms. All forms of austerities, expiations,
sacrifices, charitable gifts, holy rites do not merit even a sixteenth part of
the benefit of Pranayama.
The total withdrawal of the sense-organs operating in their respective objects
is called Pratyahara. The sense-organs are the mind etc. They are capable of
according heaven and hell. When restrained they yield heaven, when let loose
they are hellish. Hence the intelligent man who seeks happiness shall have
recourse to perfect knowledge and detachment, and lift up his soul through his
own soul after carefully restraining the horses of his sense-organs.
In brief, what is called Dharana is the fixation of the mind in a spot. The
spot is Siva alone and nothing else. The Dharana shall take place when the
mind is established in the spot for a stipulated duration and when it does not
swerve from the target. The initial stability of the mind is generated
through Dharana. Hence one shall endow the mind with fortitude by the
practice of Dharana.
The root `Dhyai' means to contemplate. Frequent contemplation of Siva with an
unconfounded mind is called Dhyna. It is a series of visions in the exclusion
of other visions. Eschewing everything else, Siva, the cause of
auspiciousness, the great lord of the gods, shall be mediated upon. Thus
concludes the Atharvaveda. Similarly the great goddess Siva shall be
meditated upon. In the Vedas Siva and Siva are mentioned as pervading all
living beings. In the Smrtis and Sastras they are mentioned as present
everywhere and awakened always. They are omniscient. They shall always be
meditated upon in different forms. There are two benefits accruing from
meditation, and first one being freedom from other visions and the second one
the acquisition of Siddhis, Anima etc.
The knower of Yoga shall practise Yoga with the knowledge of four things-the
meditator, the meditation, the object of meditation and the benefit of
meditation.
The meditator shall be a man who is endowed with knowledge and detachment, who
is faithful, patient, who is free from ego and who is always enthusiastic.
A person who is tired of Japa shall begin meditation. A person who is tired
of meditation shall begin Japa. A person who practises Japa and Dhyana
acquires Yoga quickly.
Dharana extends upto the twelve-petalled lotus of the heat. Dhyana is the
fixation of the Dharana in the twelve-petalled lotus. When Dhyana extends to
the twelve-petalled lotus it is called Samadhi.
Samadhi is the final state of Yoga. Through Samadhi, the lustre of intellect
begins to function.
In Samadhi, the vision is steady like the calm ocean, the form vanishes but
the vision persists.
Fixing the mind in the object of meditation he shall see it steadily. The
Yogin thus like the fire extinghuished is absorbed in Samadhi.
He nether hears nor smells nor prattles nor sees nor feels the touch. The
mind does not think.
Nor does he identify with anything external. Nor is it bound like the
inanimate log of wood. A person whose Atman has thus merged into Siva is
called Samadhistha.
Just as the lamp in a windless spot never flickers so also is the Yogin who is
Samadhistha, An intelligent man shall not swerve. He shall be steady.
All his obstacles and hindrances perish gradually if the Yogin practises the
excellent Yoga.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:
¡¥First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it
is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct¡K leaving only Heaven ... thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept screaming "Oh my God!"

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Treacherous Computing



Microsoft says it best:

The software is licensed, not sold. This agreement only gives you some rights to use the software. Microsoft reserves all other rights. Unless applicable law gives you more rights despite this limitation, you may use the software only as expressly permitted in this agreement. In doing so, you must comply with any technical limitations in the software that only allow you to use it in certain ways.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

When do cloud bottoms appear like bubbles?

When do cloud bottoms appear like bubbles? Normal cloud bottoms are flat because moist warm air that rises and cools will condense into water droplets at a very specific temperature, which usually corresponds to a very specific height. After water droplets form that air becomes an opaque cloud. Under some conditions, however, cloud pockets can develop that contain large droplets of water or ice that fall into clear air as they evaporate. Such pockets may occur in turbulent air near a thunderstorm, being seen near the top of an anvil cloud, for example. Resulting mammatus clouds can appear especially dramatic if sunlit from the side.

Although they look fake, these clouds are very real! They look this way because they are the upper-level "exhaust" of air that is lost from the back side of a supercell thunderstorm. These clouds are rare (especially with such good definition seen here) because it takes extremely strong updrafts inside a thunderstorm to produce the exhaust at high levels in the atmosphere - which then descend and take the strange appearance. The name "mammatus" is derived from the same Latin word that gives us "mammary". Any time you talk about strong updrafts in a thunderstorm, you usually have hail, and this storm had plenty of it.Hail go up to the size of baseballs, which is an excellent indication of the strength of the updraft, since it is the force of the air alone that is lifting hail that large above the freezing layer in large thunderstorms.











Other Cloud Pictures

These pictures are of a wall cloud. They show definite evidence of rotation, and the second one shows "scud" cloud, which is commonly confused with a tornado.





Friday, August 24, 2007

Thursday, August 23, 2007

How People Say SORRY

The way people apologise and their style of saying
sorry depends a lot on their personality and zodiac traits. No wonder Leos embarrass you when they say sorry while Arians will actually annoy you with their apology?..



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aries: For starters, Arians think they are so sweet,
they could not have possibly said or done things that need an
apology. So in the unlikely possibility of them actually going
down their knees to apologise, it will be a simple sorry.

Nothing less, nothing more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taurus: They are so scared to face others when they
make a mistake that by the time they resurface to tender an apology, the damage is done. So Taurans end up making foes out of friends because of their laxity in apologizing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gemini: Geminis think they are infallible and therefore will never really apologise for anything. But once they realize, they prefer to act as if nothing happened, and behave
normally with people who have a problem rather than remind
others of the incident by tendering an apology.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cancer: Cancerians will make you feel sorry for demanding one when they make a mistake. They are the legendary
characters that burn hands and slash their fingers! in order
to display the quantum of their repentance. Their repentance is dangerous.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Leo: Leos are a delightful bunch even when they are
trying to make up for their follies. They will go down their
knees, buy flowers, put up sorry posters.. do everything colorful to flatter you and make up for their mistakes. In fact it's fun to induce them to make a mistake and let them apologize for it.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Virgo: Virgos will first formally set aside a time and date and inform them what they want to tell you. Then they will mentally prepare themselves to talk out the same things. They will finally draft the script and read out whatever they want to. In short, even their heartfelt apologies sound
like well-drafted scripts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Libra: They are very vocal once they realize their folly. They never ever hesitate to come clean and admit their mistakes. In fact, they will go out of their way to convince
you about how genuinely sorry they are.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Scorpio: Scorpios are formal and think that tendering
an apology is more of a formality. So instead of just
saying sorry, they will send a formal mail or send a card,
whatever it takes to avoid direct confrontation.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Sagittarius: Sagittarians don't believe in being sorry or apologizing. For them, it is human to err and therefore saying sorry is just redundant.Interestingly, even if others make mistakes, they are pretty cool and don't expect much
from them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Capricorn: They can't take a simple sorry. They need reasons,explanations, written letters and the works to get elicit an 'ok, you may go now' phrase. They are hard to please and even harder to appease.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aquarius: They are sweet, genuine and innovative when
they think they are wrong and need to undo the damage.
Aquarians are easy on their mistakes and don't take too much time to do their sorrying.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




Pisces: Pisceans don't easily give in because they
believe that everything is about perspective. So if somebody
thinks they made a mistake! , it's because they have a wonky
perspective. Pisceans and apologies? No chance!!!



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Top 21 things an Indian does after returning to India from "US"

Top 21 things an Indian does after returning to India from "US"
===============================================
21. Tries to use credit card in road side hotel.

20. Drinks and carries mineral water and always speaks of health
conscious.

19. Sprays duo such so that he doesn't need to take bath.

18. Sneezes and says 'Excuse me'.

17. Says "Hey" instead of "Hi".
says "Yogurt" instead says "Curds".
Says "Cab" instead of "Taxi".
Says "Candy" instead of "Chocolate".
Says "Cookie" instead of "Biscuit".
Says "Free Way" instead of "Highway".
Says "got to go" instead of "Have to go".
Says "Oh" instead of "Zero", (for 704, says Seven Oh Four Instead of
Seven Zero Four)

16. Doesn't forget to crib about air pollution. Keeps cribbing every
time he steps out.
15. Says all the distances in Miles (Not in Kilo Meters), and counts
in Millions. (Not in Lakhs)
14. Tries to figure all the prices in Dollars as far as possible
(but deep down the heart multiplies by 43 times).

13. Tries to see the % of fat on the cover of a milk pocket.
12. When need to say Z (zed), never says Z (Zed), repeats "Zee"
several times, if the other person unable to get, then says X, Y Zee(but never says Zed)
11. Writes date as MM/DD/YYYY, on watching traditional DD/MM/YYYY,
says "Oh! British Style!!!!"
10. Makes fun of Indian Standard Time and Indian Road Conditions.
9. Even after 2 months, complaints about "Jet Lag".
8. Avoids eating more chili (hot) stuff.
7. Tries to drink "Diet Coke", instead of Normal Coke.
6. Tries to complain about any thing in India as if he is
experiencing it for the first time.
5. Pronounces "schedule" as "skejule", and "module" as "mojule".
4. Looks speciously towards Hotel/Dhaba food.

Few more important

3. From the luggage bag, does not remove the stickers of Airways by
which he traveled back to India, even after 4 months of arrival.
2. Takes the cabin luggage bag to short visits in India, tries to
roll the bag on Indian Roads.

Ultimate one

1. Tries to begin conversation with
"In US ...." or "When I was in US..."

The brain cannot process "OF"

Test your eyes

ALZHEIMERS' EYE TEST

Count every "F" in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE
SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTI
FIC STUDY COMBINED WITH
THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS...
(SEE BELOW)





HOW MANY ?




...................... 3?


WRONG, THERE ARE 6 -- no joke.
READ IT AGAIN !


The reasoning behind is further down.




The brain cannot process "OF".

Incredible or what? Go back and look again!!



Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is a genius.
Three is normal, four is quite rare.

Live for Others.....

Live for Others …


My wife called, 'How long will you be with that newspaper? Will you come here and make your darling daughter eat her food?

I tossed the paper away and rushed to the scene. My only daughter Sindu looked frightened; tears were welling up in her eyes. In front of her was a bowl filled to its brim with curd rice. Sindu is a nice child, quite intelligent for her age.

I cleared my throat, and picked up the bowl. 'Sindu, darling, why don't you take a few mouthful of this curd rice? Just for Dad's sake, dear.

Sindu softened a bit, and wiped her tears with the back of her hands. "Ok, Dad. I will eat - not just a few mouthfuls, but the whole lot of this. But, you should...' Sindu hesitated. 'Dad, if I eat this entire curd Rice, will you give me whatever I ask for?'

'Promise'. I covered the pink soft hand extended by my daughter with mine, and clinched the deal. Now I became a bit anxious. 'Sindu dear, you shouldn't insist on getting a computer or any such expensive items. Dad does not have that kind of money right now. Ok?'

'No, Dad. I do not want anything expensive'. Slowly and painfully, she finished eating the whole quantity.
I was silently angry with my wife and my mother for forcing my child to eat something that she detested.

After the ordeal was through, Sindu came to me with her eyes wide with expectation. All our attention was on her.
'Dad, I want to have my head shaved off, this Sunday!' was her demand.
'Atrocious!' shouted my wife, 'A girl child having her head shaved off? Impossible!' 'Never in our family!' My mother rasped. 'She has been watching too much of television. Our culture is getting totally spoiled with these TV programs!'
'Sindu darling, why don't you ask for something else? We will be sad seeing you with a clean-shaven head.'

'Please, Sindu, why don't you try to understand our feelings?' I tried to plead with her.

'Dad, you saw how difficult it was for me to eat that Curd Rice'. Sindu was in tears. 'And you promised to grant me whatever I ask for. Now, you are going back on your words. Was it not you who told me the story of King Harishchandra, and its moral that we should honor our promises no matter what?'

It was time for me to call the shots. 'Our promise must be kept.'

'Are you out your mind?' chorused my mother and wife.

'No. If we go back on our promises, she will never learn to honor her own. Sindu, your wish will be fulfilled.'

With her head clean-shaven, Sindu had a round-face, and her eyes looked big and beautiful.

On Monday morning, I dropped her at her school. It was a sight to watch my hairless Sindu walking towards her classroom. She turned around and waved. I waved back with a smile. Just then, a boy alighted from a car, and shouted, 'Sinduja, please wait for me!' What struck me was the hairless head of that boy. 'May be, that is the in-stuff', I thought.

'Sir, your daughter Sinduja is great indeed!' Without introducing herself, a lady got out of the car, and continued,' that boy who is walking along with your daughter is my son Harish. He is suffering from... leukemia.' She paused to muffle her sobs. Harish could not attend the school for the whole of the last month. He lost all his hair due to the side effects of the chemotherapy. He refused to come back to school fearing the unintentional but cruel teasing of the schoolmates. 'Sinduja visited him last week, and promised him that she will take care of the teasing issue. But, I never imagined she would sacrifice her lovely hair for the sake of my son! Sir, you and your wife are blessed to have such a noble soul as your daughter.'

I stood transfixed and then, I wept. 'My little Angel, you are teaching me how self-less real love is!'

The happiest people on this planet are not those who live on their own terms but are those who change their terms for the ones whom they love…

Love, Touch and Inspire others.
Have a wonderful life Ahead...!!

Ten Commandments For How "NOT" To Get On The Front Page Of Social Bookmarking Site

I have been a regular at Reddit and am witness to the blind rush for submission of stories on Reddit. The best part is that these stories vanish as quickly as they appear. This is my endeavour to help those guys. So here are the Ten Commandments For How "NOT" To Get On The Front Page Of Social Bookmarking Site

#10 Grammar Doesn't Matter If you can understand, readers can also understand.Your article will get the recognition it might deserve. Don't worry if your content is easy or hard for someone to read and understand !

#9 Do Dupe. Make sure your story is a copy and has been posted many times. Nothing worse than posting something everyone has never read!

#8: Impatience Is A Virtue. You can be a top submitter right away.Spam! Keep spamming at it without quality and with quantity. Eventually you will rise to prominence!

#7: Don't Be Helpful. Posting information which is not helpful and has crap content (from personal knowledge or another reputable Internet source) is always a good way to make friends and gain respect.

#6: Timing. Anytime is the best time to submit stories. In general, if you can't get your story out early in the morning, right before everyone gets to a computer, then you got a leg up.

#5: Know Your Community. All Social bookmarking sites are your playground. Don't try to understand the interest/culture of individual sites. Submit any story anywhere without blinking twice!

#4: Personal Blogs. Do become a spammer, only link to stories that you post on your blog and "YOU" really think are interesting.

#3: Concentrate On Your Neighbours Interests. If it is fun for your neighbour, then it becomes easy. Make sure you are submitting something that interests your neighbour, chances are there are other people who enjoy their interests.Never let your personal interest come into submitting links!

#2: The Title. Don't try to catch the audience’s eye. If the title stinks, everyone is happy!

#1: RSS Feeds.. Don't have them. No need, you are only submitting your own blog posting!



Any deviation from these Ten Commandments are only at your risk and there is a risk of getting to the top of your favorite social bookmarking site.

For guys who are lazy to even find a bookmarking site, your only chance is to read further

1 30daytags http://www.30daytags.com/ 2 AllMyFavorites http://www.allmyfavorites.net/ 3 aworldofhelp http://www.aworldofhelp.com/ 4 Backflip http://www.backflip.com/ 5 beanrocket http://www.beanrocket.com/ 6 Bibsonomy http://www.bibsonomy.org/ 7 Blauer Bote http://bookmarks.blauerbote.com/ 8 BlinkBits http://blinkbits.com/ 9 Blinklist http://www.blinklist.com/ 10 BlogHop http://www.bloghop.com/ 11 BlogLot http://www.bloglot.com/ 12 Blogmarks http://blogmarks.net/ 13 Blogmemes http://blogmemes.net/ 14 BlogPulse http://www.blogpulse.com/ 15 Blue Dot http://bluedot.us/ 16 BmAccess http://www.bmaccess.net/ 17 browsr http://www.browsr.com/ 18 Buddymarks http://buddymarks.com/ 19 CiteUlike http://www.citeulike.org/ 20 clipclip http://www.clipclip.org/ 21 ClipMarks http://www.clipmarks.com/ 22 CommonTimes http://www.commontimes.org/ 23 Complore http://complore.com/ 24 Conn otea http://www.connotea.org/ 25 Connectedy http://www.connectedy.com/ 26 Connotea http://www.connotea.org/ 27 de.lirio.us http://de.lirio.us/ 28 del.icio.us http://del.icio.us/ 29 digg http://digg.com/ 30 diigo http://www.diigo.com/ 31 Dinnerbuzz http://www.dinnerbuzz.com/ 32 Dohat http://dohat.com/ 33 Fantacular http://www.fantacular.com/ 34 Fark http://cgi.fark.com/ 35 Favoor http://www.favoor.com/ 36 Feed Me Links http://feedmelinks.com/ 37 FeedMarker http://www.feedmarker.com/ 38 Flipskipper http://www.flipskipper.com/ 39 Frassle http://frassle.rura.org/ 40 Furl http://www.furl.net/ 41 Gibeo http://www.gibeo.net/ 42 Gibeo http://www.gibeo.net/ 43 Give a Link http://www.givealink.org/ 44 GoKoDo http://mybookmark.gokodo.com/ 45 Google Notebook http://www.google.comnotebook/ 46 Gravee http://www.gravee.com/ 47 Hyperlinkomatic http://www.hyperlinkomatic.com/ 48 IceRocket http://www.icerocket.com/ 49 igooi http://www.igooi.com/ 50 IndiaGram http://www.indiagram.com/ 51 Indiamarks http://www.indiamarks.com/ 52 Jots http://jots.com/ 53 Kaboodle http://www.kaboodle.com/ 54 kinja http://kinja.com/ 55 Kuro5hin http://www.kuro5hin.org/ 56 leze.de and http://www.leze.de/ 57 Library Thing http://www.librarything.com/ 58 Lilisto http://lilisto.com/ 59 Link Blog http://www.linkblog.com.br/ 60 Link Filter http://www.linkfilter.net/ 61 Linkagogo http://www.linkagogo.com/ 62 linkaGoGo http://www.linkagogo.com/ 63 linkfilter.net http://www.linkfilter.net/ 64 Linkroll http://www.linkroll.com/ 65 Listible http://www.listible.com/ 66 looklater http://looklater.com/ 67 Lookmarks http://www.lookmarks.com/ 68 Loom http://loom.delymyth.net/ 69 LQ Bookmarks http://bookmarks.linuxquestions.org/ 70 Magnolia http://ma.gnolia.com/ 71 maple http://www.maple.nu/ 72 maple.nu http://www.maple.nu/ 73 Memestreams http://www.memestreams.net/ 74 MesFavs http://mesfavs.com/ 75 MyProgs http://myprogs.net/ 76 netvouz http://netvouz.com/ 77 NetworkMenus http://www.networkmenus.co.uk/ 78 NewNooze http://www.newnooze.com/ 79 Newsvine http://www.newsvine.com/ 80 openBM http://www.openbm.de/ 81 OYAX http://www.oyax.com/ 82 Raw Sugar http://www.rawsugar.com/ 83 Reader2 http://reader2.com/ 84 reddit http://reddit.com/ 85 Rojo http://www.rojo.com/ 86 Rollyo http://www.rollyo.com/ 87 Scuttle http://scuttle.org/ 88 Setnalo http://segnalo.com/ 89 Shadows http://www.shadows.com/ 90 Shoutwire http://www.shoutwire.com/ 91 Simpy http://simpy.com/ 92 SiterTagger http://www.sitetagger.com/ 93 slashdot http://slashdot.org/submit.pl 94 Smarking http://smarking.com/ 95 Social Bookmarking http://socialbookmarking.org/ 96 Spurl http://www.spurl.net/ 97 Squiddo http://www.squidoo.com/ 98 StumbleUpon http://www.stumbleupon.com/ 99 Sync2It http://www.sync2it.com/ 100 Taghop http://www.taghop.com/ 101 tagtooga http://www.tagtooga.com/ 102 Tailrank http://tailrank.com/ 103 Technorati http://technorati.com/ 104 Textnotes http://www.textnotes.de/ 105 TheThingsIWant http://www.thethingsiwant.com/ 106 Threadwatch http://www.threadwatch.org/ 107 Ticklr http://www.ticklr.net/ 108 Tutorialism http://www.tutorialism.com/ 109 Unalog http://unalog.com/ 110 URLex http://www.urlex.info/ 111 Wazima http://www.wazima.com/ 112 WebFeeds http://www.web-feeds.com/ 113 Wiklink http://www.erational.org/ 114 Wink http://www.wink.com/ 115 Wists http://www.wists.com/ 116 wURLdBook http://www.wurldbook.com/ 117 Yahoo My Web http://myweb2.search.yahoo.com/ 118 Yono http://www.yoono.com/ 119 Youtube http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Youtube 120 zurpy http://zurpy.com/ 121 Flickr Flickr 122 Youtube YouTube 123 Popurls.com

How Different Kinds of Music Got Their Names

Jazz: Five men on the same stage all playing different tunes.
Jazz began as a West Coast slang term around 1912, the meaning of which varied but which did not refer to music or sex. Jazz came to mean jazz music in Chicago around 1915. Jazz was played in New Orleans prior to that time but was not called jazz.

Blues: Played exclusively by people who woke up this morning.
The phrase the blues is a reference to having a fit of the blue devils, meaning 'down' spirits, depression and sadness. An early reference to "the blues" can be found in George Colman's farce Blue devils, a farce in one act (1798). Later during the 19th century, the phrase was used as a euphemism for delirium tremens and the police.
Though usage of the phrase in African American music may be older, it has been attested to since 1912, when Hart Wand's "Dallas Blues" became the first copyrighted Blues composition. In lyrics the phrase is often used to describe a depressed mood.

World Music: A dozen different types of percussion all going at once.
The term became current in the 1980s as a marketing/classificatory device in the media and the music industry, and it is generally used to classify any kind of "foreign" (i.e. non-Western) music.

Opera: People singing when they should be talking.

Rap: People talking when they should be singing.
Although the word rap has sometimes been claimed to be a backronym of the phrase "Rhythmic American Poetry", "Rhythm and Poetry", "Rhythmically Applied Poetry", or "Rhythmically Associated Poetry", use of the word to describe quick and slangy speech or repartee long predates the musical form

Classical: Discover the other 45 minutes they left out of the TV ad.
The term classical music did not appear until the early 19th century, in an attempt to "canonize" the period from Bach to Beethoven as an era in music parallel to the golden age of sculpture, architecture and art of classical antiquity (from which very little music has directly survived). The earliest reference to "classical music" recorded by the Oxford English Dictionary is from about 1836. Since that time it has come into common parlance as a generic term denoting the opposite of light or popular music.

Folk: Endless songs about shipwrecks in the 19th century.
The word became colloquialized (usually in the plural "folks") in English in the sense "people", and was considered unelegant by the beginning of the 19th century. It re-entered academic English through the invention of the word folklore in 1846 by the antiquarian William J. Thoms (1803-85) as an Anglo-Saxonism. This word revived folk in a modern sense of "of the common people, whose culture is handed down orally", and opened up a flood of compound formations, eg. folk art (1921), folk-hero (1899), folk-medicine (1898), folk-tale (1891), folk-song (1847), folk-dance (1912). Folk-music is from 1889; in reference to the branch of modern popular music (originally associated with Greenwich Village in New York City) it dates from 1958. It is also regional music.

Big Band: 20 men who take it in turns to stand up plus a drummer.
A big band is a type of musical ensemble associated with playing jazz music and which became popular during the Swing Era from the early 1930s until the late 1940s. A big band typically consists of approximately 12 to 19 musicians and contains saxophones, trumpets, trombones, and a rhythm section. The terms jazz band, jazz ensemble, stage band, jazz orchestra, and dance band are also used to refer to this type of ensemble.

Heavy Metal: Codpiece and chaps.
The origin of the term heavy metal in a musical context is uncertain.
The first documented usage of the term to describe a musical style is in a May 1971 Creem review by Mike Saunders of Sir Lord Baltimore's Kingdom Come: "Sir Lord Baltimore seems to have down pat most all the best heavy metal tricks in the book."[27] Creem critic Lester Bangs is credited with popularizing the term via his early 1970s essays on bands such as Led Zeppelin and Black Sabbath.[28] "Heavy metal" may have initially been used as a jibe by a number of music critics, but it was quickly adopted by fans of the style.
The terms "heavy metal" and "hard rock" have often been used interchangeably, particularly in discussing bands of the 1970s, a period when the terms were largely synonymous

House Music: OK as long as it's not the house next door.
The origins of the term "house music" are disputed. The term may be derived from the name of a club called the The Warehouse, which was one of the nightclubs that became popular among the teenagers living in the Chicago area in the late 1970s and early 1980s. One of these nightclubs, The Warehouse was patronized primarily by gay black & Latino men , who came to dance to DJ Frankie Knuckles' mix of classic disco, European synthpop, new wave, industrial, and punk recordings. Knuckles released his dance tracks and mixes on the Traxx record label, which became known as house music.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Julian Beever....an Artist

Julian Beever is an English artist who's famous for his art on the pavement of England, France, Germany, USA, Australia and Belgium. Beever gives to his drawings an amazing 3D illusion.









This drawing of a Rescue was to be viewed using an inverting mirror



Politicians Meeting Their End



Remember, both his feet in reality are flat on the pavement
















People are actually avoiding walking in the "hole"






















































































































Tuesday, August 21, 2007

I have been married to a *S*ex maniac for the past 22 years...A letter


"A woman without her man is nothing" Punctuate it correctly


So what if we can't have a baby......


I can't believe how materialistic you women are

A woman parked her brand-new Lexus in front of her office ready to show it off to her colleagues. As she got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore off the door on the driver's side.

The woman immediately grabbed her cell phone, dialled 911, and within minutes a policeman pulled up. Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the woman started screaming hysterically.
Her Lexus, which she had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.

When the woman finally wound down from her ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief.

"I can't believe how materialistic you women are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."

"How can you say such a thing?" asked the woman.

The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."

"OH MY GOD!" screamed the woman. "Where's my new bracelet?

Monday, August 20, 2007

Solution to 1 minute Question paper

1 Minute Question paper



So... What's your time...

1 minute Question Paper

The time starts now....



Solution to 1 Minute Question paper

George Carlin's Views on Aging

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

"How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next? number, or even a few ahead.

"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . .
you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your
dreams are gone. But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a
day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I Was JUST 92."

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!" May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay "them."

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain be idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10.Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER: Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

And if you don't send this to at least 8 people - who cares? But do share this with someone. We all need to live life to its fullest each day!!

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Finally you can go out playing again!

Congratulations!!!

You have just reached the End of the Internet.

Finally you can go out playing again!

Have a good time and thank you for using the Internet.

Start Over

(not advised :)

Future of mobile phone technology

The past, present, and future of cell phones

Just in the last few years cell phones (usually called mobile phones outside the US) have become de facto standards for most of the population. What once used to be a luxury item for a select few that was carried around in a large leather bag and was the size of the brick, is no longer. Let see what we got here?

Samsung U600 SIM Free Mobile Phone

Measuring an incredible 10.9mm, the Samsung U600 is the slimmest sliding handset available on the market. Samsung have managed to incorporate a 3.2 megapixel camera, MP3 player and stereo Bluetooth support into U600.

Nokia 6300 SIM Free Mobile Phone

With its sleek lines, well proportioned form, and slim build, the Nokia 6300 is following the trend for ultra-thin, light-weight mobile phones.The 6300 boasts an impressive list of features expected of this level of device.

Sony Ericsson W880i Walkman SIM Free Phone

The Ultra Slim designed Sony Ericsson W880i is the slimmest looking music phone yet. At just 9.4 mm thin this stunning device combines the full Sony Walkman music experience with the most up to date mobile phone features into a device that fits easily into a pocket.

Starting A Home Business On The Right Foot Can Equal Success

Starting a home business involves many different aspects. It is not simply about advertising or selling. A home business requires plenty of back office work to make it run smoothly. The work a business owner does behind the scenes is the framework of the whole business, so starting a home business without thinking about this is a recipe for disaster.

One of the first things a business owner needs to do when starting a home business is to get their record keeping set up. From the first action a person takes as a business owner they will need to keep records. They should have accounting records that track all expenses and revenue. They will need a filing system to keep track of receipts and bills. They will need a system for tracking inventory. They will also need to set up a customer database so they can keep customer information secure and organized.

Depending upon the type of business the business owner will need to set up their shop. In the physical world this includes finding a location and getting it ready for business. This could mean securing a loan or setting up a rental agreement. They may also have to purchase shelving or other products to display their products. They will also need to get insurance to protect their business and customers.

If they are setting up their business online then they will need to create a website, secure a domain name and set up web hosting. This involves creating a website that has quality content, is easy to use and includes automated tools that makes it simple for customers to order products or send inquires to the owner. The domain name should be something that is easy to remember and catchy enough that a person won t forget it. Web hosting should be with a company that can offer the amount of bandwidth needed and be reliable so the downtime is minimal.

Lastly, the business owner has to get a marketing plan. The marketing plan should include every detail about where the business will be advertised and how it will be advertised. This plan should be as detailed as possible, even including the ads written out and ready to place. Marketing is going to be the ultimate key to getting business.

Starting a home business involves a lot of upfront work. This time investment is going to be very crucial to the overall success of the business, though. The business owner should spend as much time as they feel is necessary with the start up process. Starting a home business can be stressful and it can be very time consuming, but in the end, if a business owner was diligent about their start up planning they will have a successful business.

The Origin and Future of Web Hosting

The Internet and web hosting services that we know today are both far different beasts than those that originated almost forty years ago. Where that service was a system purely put in place to link computers of the company that was the precursor to NASA, today's incarnation has a multitude of services. Whether you're simply a single person looking for a website as a hobby, or a multi-million dollar company looking to prove more successful than your competitors, making sure you have the right web host is paramount. But what is web hosting, and what does the future hold for it?

What we know as web hosting today was first designed and used in 1990, by a single user, although it wasn't until 1991 that web hosting (where a company or organization will give you internet space to host your products or service) really came into its own. By paying a company a fee to host your services on the web, it takes a lot of the work out of your hands, such as admin, email accounts, libraries, etc, so that you can concentrate on the business at hand, whether that's writing a journalistic diary, or selling goods online.

Now, fifteen years later, web hosting is such big business that there are over thirty thousand companies offering some kind of web hosting service, whether it's space for a personal site or a business-heavy option. Such is the growth in this area that the traditional heavy-hitting companies like Microsoft and Yahoo are having to constantly re-evaluate what they offer their customers, who will quite rightly go to who offers the best package, not only now but for the future.

Yet surely this kind of growth can only accommodate so many people, or users, before it reaches its peak? Well, yes and no. With industry experts predicting that next year may see the highest yet for the web hosting industry, with over 100 billion dollars being spent on services, it's obvious that those web hosting companies who can adapt will come out the strongest.

It's no longer going to be enough to simply provide a service. Users have let it be known that they now expect a far more in-depth support back up; affiliate programmes are also becoming more popular, and by paying its "customers" to use their web space (via bringing other users on board), the web hosting companies that listen to their users will be the ones that continue to succeed and grow. And in an industry that's becoming more price-competitive than ever, it's this difference that will count the most.

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Friday, August 17, 2007

"Sir, do you have anything else that your wife does not use?"

The wife comes home early & finds her husband in
their master bedroom making love to a beautiful, young lady!
"You unfaithful, disrespectful pig! What are you doing?
How dare you do this to me the faithful wife, the mother
of your children! I'm leaving this house, I want divorce!"
The husband, replies "Wait, Wait a minute! Before you leave,
at least listen to what happened. You can't say I'm dishonest."

"Hmm, I don't know, well, it'll be the last thing I will hear from you.
But make it fast, you unfaithful pig, you!"
The husband begins to tell his story . . .

"While driving home this young lady asked for a ride. I saw her so defenseless
that I went ahead and allowed her in my car. I noticed that
she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She
mentioned that at she had not eaten for 3 days.
With great compassion I brought her home and warmed
up the enchiladas that I made for you last night that you
wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll gain weight;
the poor thing practically devoured them."

"Since she was very dirty I asked if she wanted to take a
shower. While she was showering, I noticed her clothes were
dirty and full of holes so I threw her clothes away. Since
she needed clothes, I gave her the pair of jeans that you
have had for a few years, that you can no longer wear
because they are too tight on you, I also gave her the
blouse that I gave you on our anniversary and you don't
wear because I don't have good taste."

"I gave her the pullover that my sister gave you for
Christmas that you will not wear just to bother my
sister and I also gave her the boots that you bought
at the expensive boutique that you never wore again
after you saw your co-worker wearing the same pair."

The husband continues his story . . . . .

"The young woman was very grateful to me and I
walked her to the door.When we got to the door she
turned around and with tears coming out of her eyes,

she asks me:

"Sir, do you have anything else that your wife does not use?"

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Depression

In any given 1-year period, 9.5 percent of the population, or about 20.9 million American adults, suffer from a depressive illness5 The economic cost for this disorder is high, but the cost in human suffering cannot be estimated. Depressive illnesses often interfere with normal functioning and cause pain and suffering not only to those who have a disorder, but also to those who care about them. Serious depression can destroy family life as well as the life of the ill person. But much of this suffering is unnecessary.

Most people with a depressive illness do not seek treatment, although the great majority even those whose depression is extremely severe can be helped. Thanks to years of fruitful research, there are now medications and psychosocial therapies such as cognitive/behavioral, "talk" or interpersonal that ease the pain of depression.

Unfortunately, many people do not recognize that depression is a treatable illness. If you feel that you or someone you care about is one of the many undiagnosed depressed people in this country, the information presented here may help you take the steps that may save your own or someone else's life.


WHAT IS A DEPRESSIVE DISORDER?
A depressive disorder is an illness that involves the body, mood, and thoughts. It affects the way a person eats and sleeps, the way one feels about oneself, and the way one thinks about things. A depressive disorder is not the same as a passing blue mood. It is not a sign of personal weakness or a condition that can be willed or wished away. People with a depressive illness cannot merely "pull themselves together" and get better. Without treatment, symptoms can last for weeks, months, or years. Appropriate treatment, however, can help most people who suffer from depression.

TYPES OF DEPRESSION
Depressive disorders come in different forms, just as is the case with other illnesses such as heart disease. This pamphlet briefly describes three of the most common types of depressive disorders. However, within these types there are variations in the number of symptoms, their severity, and persistence.

Major depression is manifested by a combination of symptoms (see symptom list) that interfere with the ability to work, study, sleep, eat, and enjoy once pleasurable activities. Such a disabling episode of depression may occur only once but more commonly occurs several times in a lifetime.

A less severe type of depression, dysthymia, involves long-term, chronic symptoms that do not disable, but keep one from functioning well or from feeling good. Many people with dysthymia also experience major depressive episodes at some time in their lives.

Another type of depression is bipolar disorder, also called manic-depressive illness. Not nearly as prevalent as other forms of depressive disorders, bipolar disorder is characterized by cycling mood changes: severe highs (mania) and lows (depression). Sometimes the mood switches are dramatic and rapid, but most often they are gradual. When in the depressed cycle, an individual can have any or all of the symptoms of a depressive disorder. When in the manic cycle, the individual may be overactive, overtalkative, and have a great deal of energy. Mania often affects thinking, judgment, and social behavior in ways that cause serious problems and embarrassment. For example, the individual in a manic phase may feel elated, full of grand schemes that might range from unwise business decisions to romantic sprees. Mania, left untreated, may worsen to a psychotic state.

SYMPTOMS OF DEPRESSION AND MANIA
Not everyone who is depressed or manic experiences every symptom. Some people experience a few symptoms, some many. Severity of symptoms varies with individuals and also varies over time.

Depression
Persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" mood
Feelings of hopelessness, pessimism
Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, helplessness
Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities that were once enjoyed, including sex
Decreased energy, fatigue, being "slowed down"
Difficulty concentrating, remembering, making decisions
Insomnia, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping
Appetite and/or weight loss or overeating and weight gain
Thoughts of death or suicide; suicide attempts
Restlessness, irritability
Persistent physical symptoms that do not respond to treatment, such as headaches, digestive disorders, and chronic pain
Mania
Abnormal or excessive elation
Unusual irritability
Decreased need for sleep
Grandiose notions
Increased talking
Racing thoughts
Increased sexual desire
Markedly increased energy
Poor judgment
Inappropriate social behavior
CAUSES OF DEPRESSION
Some types of depression run in families, suggesting that a biological vulnerability can be inherited. This seems to be the case with bipolar disorder. Studies of families in which members of each generation develop bipolar disorder found that those with the illness have a somewhat different genetic makeup than those who do not get ill. However, the reverse is not true: Not everybody with the genetic makeup that causes vulnerability to bipolar disorder will have the illness. Apparently additional factors, possibly stresses at home, work, or school, are involved in its onset.

In some families, major depression also seems to occur generation after generation. However, it can also occur in people who have no family history of depression. Whether inherited or not, major depressive disorder is often associated with changes in brain structures or brain function.

People who have low self-esteem, who consistently view themselves and the world with pessimism or who are readily overwhelmed by stress, are prone to depression. Whether this represents a psychological predisposition or an early form of the illness is not clear.

In recent years, researchers have shown that physical changes in the body can be accompanied by mental changes as well. Medical illnesses such as stroke, a heart attack, cancer, Parkinson's disease, and hormonal disorders can cause depressive illness, making the sick person apathetic and unwilling to care for his or her physical needs, thus prolonging the recovery period. Also, a serious loss, difficult relationship, financial problem, or any stressful (unwelcome or even desired) change in life patterns can trigger a depressive episode. Very often, a combination of genetic, psychological, and environmental factors is involved in the onset of a depressive disorder. Later episodes of illness typically are precipitated by only mild stresses, or none at all.

Depression in Women
Women experience depression about twice as often as men.1 Many hormonal factors may contribute to the increased rate of depression in women particularly such factors as menstrual cycle changes, pregnancy, miscarriage, postpartum period, pre-menopause, and menopause. Many women also face additional stresses such as responsibilities both at work and home, single parenthood, and caring for children and for aging parents.

A recent NIMH study showed that in the case of severe premenstrual syndrome (PMS), women with a preexisting vulnerability to PMS experienced relief from mood and physical symptoms when their sex hormones were suppressed. Shortly after the hormones were re-introduced, they again developed symptoms of PMS. Women without a history of PMS reported no effects of the hormonal manipulation.6,7

Many women are also particularly vulnerable after the birth of a baby. The hormonal and physical changes, as well as the added responsibility of a new life, can be factors that lead to postpartum depression in some women. While transient "blues" are common in new mothers, a full-blown depressive episode is not a normal occurrence and requires active intervention. Treatment by a sympathetic physician and the family's emotional support for the new mother are prime considerations in aiding her to recover her physical and mental well-being and her ability to care for and enjoy the infant.

Depression in Men
Although men are less likely to suffer from depression than women, 6 million men in the United States are affected by the illness. Men are less likely to admit to depression, and doctors are less likely to suspect it. The rate of suicide in men is four times that of women, though more women attempt it. In fact, after age 70, the rate of men's suicide rises, reaching a peak after age 85.

Depression can also affect the physical health in men differently from women. A new study shows that, although depression is associated with an increased risk of coronary heart disease in both men and women, only men suffer a high death rate.2

Men's depression is often masked by alcohol or drugs, or by the socially acceptable habit of working excessively long hours. Depression typically shows up in men not as feeling hopeless and helpless, but as being irritable, angry, and discouraged; hence, depression may be difficult to recognize as such in men. Even if a man realizes that he is depressed, he may be less willing than a woman to seek help. Encouragement and support from concerned family members can make a difference. In the workplace, employee assistance professionals or worksite mental health programs can be of assistance in helping men understand and accept depression as a real illness that needs treatment.

Depression in the Elderly
Some people have the mistaken idea that it is normal for the elderly to feel depressed. On the contrary, most older people feel satisfied with their lives. Sometimes, though, when depression develops, it may be dismissed as a normal part of aging. Depression in the elderly, undiagnosed and untreated, causes needless suffering for the family and for the individual who could otherwise live a fruitful life. When he or she does go to the doctor, the symptoms described are usually physical, for the older person is often reluctant to discuss feelings of hopelessness, sadness, loss of interest in normally pleasurable activities, or extremely prolonged grief after a loss.

Recognizing how depressive symptoms in older people are often missed, many health care professionals are learning to identify and treat the underlying depression. They recognize that some symptoms may be side effects of medication the older person is taking for a physical problem, or they may be caused by a co-occurring illness. If a diagnosis of depression is made, treatment with medication and/or psychotherapy will help the depressed person return to a happier, more fulfilling life. Recent research suggests that brief psychotherapy (talk therapies that help a person in day-to-day relationships or in learning to counter the distorted negative thinking that commonly accompanies depression) is effective in reducing symptoms in short-term depression in older persons who are medically ill. Psychotherapy is also useful in older patients who cannot or will not take medication. Efficacy studies show that late-life depression can be treated with psychotherapy.4

Improved recognition and treatment of depression in late life will make those years more enjoyable and fulfilling for the depressed elderly person, the family, and caretakers.

Depression in Children
Only in the past two decades has depression in children been taken very seriously. The depressed child may pretend to be sick, refuse to go to school, cling to a parent, or worry that the parent may die. Older children may sulk, get into trouble at school, be negative, grouchy, and feel misunderstood. Because normal behaviors vary from one childhood stage to another, it can be difficult to tell whether a child is just going through a temporary "phase" or is suffering from depression. Sometimes the parents become worried about how the child's behavior has changed, or a teacher mentions that "your child doesn't seem to be himself." In such a case, if a visit to the child's pediatrician rules out physical symptoms, the doctor will probably suggest that the child be evaluated, preferably by a psychiatrist who specializes in the treatment of children. If treatment is needed, the doctor may suggest that another therapist, usually a social worker or a psychologist, provide therapy while the psychiatrist will oversee medication if it is needed. Parents should not be afraid to ask questions: What are the therapist's qualifications? What kind of therapy will the child have? Will the family as a whole participate in therapy? Will my child's therapy include an antidepressant? If so, what might the side effects be?

The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) has identified the use of medications for depression in children as an important area for research. The NIMH-supported Research Units on Pediatric Psychopharmacology (RUPPs) form a network of seven research sites where clinical studies on the effects of medications for mental disorders can be conducted in children and adolescents. Among the medications being studied are antidepressants, some of which have been found to be effective in treating children with depression, if properly monitored by the child's physician.8

DIAGNOSTIC EVALUATION AND TREATMENT
The first step to getting appropriate treatment for depression is a physical examination by a physician. Certain medications as well as some medical conditions such as a viral infection can cause the same symptoms as depression, and the physician should rule out these possibilities through examination, interview, and lab tests. If a physical cause for the depression is ruled out, a psychological evaluation should be done, by the physician or by referral to a psychiatrist or psychologist.

A good diagnostic evaluation will include a complete history of symptoms, i.e., when they started, how long they have lasted, how severe they are, whether the patient had them before and, if so, whether the symptoms were treated and what treatment was given. The doctor should ask about alcohol and drug use, and if the patient has thoughts about death or suicide. Further, a history should include questions about whether other family members have had a depressive illness and, if treated, what treatments they may have received and which were effective.

Last, a diagnostic evaluation should include a mental status examination to determine if speech or thought patterns or memory have been affected, as sometimes happens in the case of a depressive or manic-depressive illness.

Treatment choice will depend on the outcome of the evaluation. There are a variety of antidepressant medications and psychotherapies that can be used to treat depressive disorders. Some people with milder forms may do well with psychotherapy alone. People with moderate to severe depression most often benefit from antidepressants. Most do best with combined treatment: medication to gain relatively quick symptom relief and psychotherapy to learn more effective ways to deal with life's problems, including depression. Depending on the patient's diagnosis and severity of symptoms, the therapist may prescribe medication and/or one of the several forms of psychotherapy that have proven effective for depression.

Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) is useful, particularly for individuals whose depression is severe or life threatening or who cannot take antidepressant medication.3 ECT often is effective in cases where antidepressant medications do not provide sufficient relief of symptoms. In recent years, ECT has been much improved. A muscle relaxant is given before treatment, which is done under brief anesthesia. Electrodes are placed at precise locations on the head to deliver electrical impulses. The stimulation causes a brief (about 30 seconds) seizure within the brain. The person receiving ECT does not consciously experience the electrical stimulus. For full therapeutic benefit, at least several sessions of ECT, typically given at the rate of three per week, are required.

Medications
There are several types of antidepressant medications used to treat depressive disorders. These include newer medications chiefly the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) the tricyclics, and the monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs). The SSRIs and other newer medications that affect neurotransmitters such as dopamine or norepinephrine generally have fewer side effects than tricyclics. Sometimes the doctor will try a variety of antidepressants before finding the most effective medication or combination of medications. Sometimes the dosage must be increased to be effective. Although some improvements may be seen in the first few weeks, antidepressant medications must be taken regularly for 3 to 4 weeks (in some cases, as many as 8 weeks) before the full therapeutic effect occurs.

Patients often are tempted to stop medication too soon. They may feel better and think they no longer need the medication. Or they may think the medication isn't helping at all. It is important to keep taking medication until it has a chance to work, though side effects (see section on Side Effects on page 13) may appear before antidepressant activity does. Once the individual is feeling better, it is important to continue the medication for at least 4 to 9 months to prevent a recurrence of the depression. Some medications must be stopped gradually to give the body time to adjust. Never stop taking an antidepressant without consulting the doctor for instructions on how to safely discontinue the medication. For individuals with bipolar disorder or chronic major depression, medication may have to be maintained indefinitely.

Antidepressant drugs are not habit-forming. However, as is the case with any type of medication prescribed for more than a few days, antidepressants have to be carefully monitored to see if the correct dosage is being given. The doctor will check the dosage and its effectiveness regularly.

For the small number of people for whom MAO inhibitors are the best treatment, it is necessary to avoid certain foods that contain high levels of tyramine, such as many cheeses, wines, and pickles, as well as medications such as decongestants. The interaction of tyramine with MAOIs can bring on a hypertensive crisis, a sharp increase in blood pressure that can lead to a stroke. The doctor should furnish a complete list of prohibited foods that the patient should carry at all times. Other forms of antidepressants require no food restrictions.

Medications of any kind prescribed, over-the counter, or borrowed should never be mixed without consulting the doctor. Other health professionals who may prescribe a drug such as a dentist or other medical specialist should be told of the medications the patient is taking. Some drugs, although safe when taken alone can, if taken with others, cause severe and dangerous side effects. Some drugs, like alcohol or street drugs, may reduce the effectiveness of antidepressants and should be avoided. This includes wine, beer, and hard liquor. Some people who have not had a problem with alcohol use may be permitted by their doctor to use a modest amount of alcohol while taking one of the newer antidepressants.

Antianxiety drugs or sedatives are not antidepressants. They are sometimes prescribed along with antidepressants; however, they are not effective when taken alone for a depressive disorder. Stimulants, such as amphetamines, are not effective antidepressants, but they are used occasionally under close supervision in medically ill depressed patients.

Questions about any antidepressant prescribed, or problems that may be related to the medication, should be discussed with the doctor.

Lithium has for many years been the treatment of choice for bipolar disorder, as it can be effective in smoothing out the mood swings common to this disorder. Its use must be carefully monitored, as the range between an effective dose and a toxic one is small. If a person has preexisting thyroid, kidney, or heart disorders or epilepsy, lithium may not be recommended. Fortunately, other medications have been found to be of benefit in controlling mood swings. Among these are two mood-stabilizing anticonvulsants, carbamazepine (Tegretol®) and valproate (Depakote®). Both of these medications have gained wide acceptance in clinical practice, and valproate has been approved by the Food and Drug Administration for first-line treatment of acute mania. Other anticonvulsants that are being used now include lamotrigine (Lamictal®) and gabapentin (Neurontin®): their role in the treatment hierarchy of bipolar disorder remains under study.

Most people who have bipolar disorder take more than one medication including, along with lithium and/or an anticonvulsant, a medication for accompanying agitation, anxiety, depression, or insomnia. Finding the best possible combination of these medications is of utmost importance to the patient and requires close monitoring by the physician.

Side Effects
Antidepressants may cause mild and, usually, temporary side effects (sometimes referred to as adverse effects) in some people. Typically these are annoying, but not serious. However, any unusual reactions or side effects or those that interfere with functioning should be reported to the doctor immediately. The most common side effects of tricyclic antidepressants, and ways to deal with them, are:

Dry mouthit is helpful to drink sips of water; chew sugarless gum; clean teeth daily.
Constipation bran cereals, prunes, fruit, and vegetables should be in the diet.
Bladder problems emptying the bladder may be troublesome, and the urine stream may not be as strong as usual; the doctor should be notified if there is marked difficulty or pain.
Sexual problems sexual functioning may change; if worrisome, it should be discussed with the doctor.
Blurred vision this will pass soon and will not usually necessitate new glasses.
Dizziness rising from the bed or chair slowly is helpful.
Drowsiness as a daytime problem this usually passes soon. A person feeling drowsy or sedated should not drive or operate heavy equipment. The more sedating antidepressants are generally taken at bedtime to help sleep and minimize daytime drowsiness.
The newer antidepressants have different types of side effects:

Headache this will usually go away.
Nausea this is also temporary, but even when it occurs, it is transient after each dose.
Nervousness and insomnia (trouble falling asleep or waking often during the night) these may occur during the first few weeks; dosage reductions or time will usually resolve them.
Agitation (feeling jittery) if this happens for the first time after the drug is taken and is more than transient, the doctor should be notified.
Sexual problems the doctor should be consulted if the problem is persistent or worrisome.
Herbal Therapy
In the past few years, much interest has risen in the use of herbs in the treatment of both depression and anxiety. St. John's wort (Hypericum perforatum), an herb used extensively in the treatment of mild to moderate depression in Europe, has recently aroused interest in the United States. St. John's wort, an attractive bushy, low-growing plant covered with yellow flowers in summer, has been used for centuries in many folk and herbal remedies. Today in Germany, Hypericum is used in the treatment of depression more than any other antidepressant. However, the scientific studies that have been conducted on its use have been short-term and have used several different doses.

Because of the widespread interest in St. John's wort, the National Institutes of Health (NIH) conducted a 3-year study, sponsored by three NIH components the National Institute of Mental Health, the National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine, and the Office of Dietary Supplements. The study was designed to include 336 patients with major depression of moderate severity, randomly assigned to an 8-week trial with one-third of patients receiving a uniform dose of St. John's wort, another third sertraline, a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) commonly prescribed for depression, and the final third a placebo (a pill that looks exactly like the SSRI and the St. John's wort, but has no active ingredients). The study participants who responded positively were followed for an additional 18 weeks. At the end of the first phase of the study, participants were measured on two scales, one for depression and one for overall functioning. There was no significant difference in rate of response for depression, but the scale for overall functioning was better for the antidepressant than for either St. John's wort or placebo. While this study did not support the use of St. John's wort in the treatment of major depression, ongoing NIH-supported research is examining a possible role for St. John's wort in the treatment of milder forms of depression.

The Food and Drug Administration issued a Public Health Advisory on February 10, 2000. It stated that St. John's wort appears to affect an important metabolic pathway that is used by many drugs prescribed to treat conditions such as AIDS, heart disease, depression, seizures, certain cancers, and rejection of transplants. Therefore, health care providers should alert their patients about these potential drug interactions.

Some other herbal supplements frequently used that have not been evaluated in large-scale clinical trials are ephedra, gingko biloba, echinacea, and ginseng. Any herbal supplement should be taken only after consultation with the doctor or other health care provider.

PSYCHOTHERAPIES
Many forms of psychotherapy, including some short-term (10-20 week) therapies, can help depressed individuals. "Talking" therapies help patients gain insight into and resolve their problems through verbal exchange with the therapist, sometimes combined with "homework" assignments between sessions. "Behavioral" therapists help patients learn how to obtain more satisfaction and rewards through their own actions and how to unlearn the behavioral patterns that contribute to or result from their depression.

Two of the short-term psychotherapies that research has shown helpful for some forms of depression are interpersonal and cognitive/behavioral therapies. Interpersonal therapists focus on the patient's disturbed personal relationships that both cause and exacerbate (or increase) the depression. Cognitive/behavioral therapists help patients change the negative styles of thinking and behaving often associated with depression.

Psychodynamic therapies, which are sometimes used to treat depressed persons, focus on resolving the patient's conflicted feelings. These therapies are often reserved until the depressive symptoms are significantly improved. In general, severe depressive illnesses, particularly those that are recurrent, will require medication (or ECT under special conditions) along with, or preceding, psychotherapy for the best outcome.

HOW TO HELP YOURSELF IF YOU ARE DEPRESSED
Depressive disorders make one feel exhausted, worthless, helpless, and hopeless. Such negative thoughts and feelings make some people feel like giving up. It is important to realize that these negative views are part of the depression and typically do not accurately reflect the actual circumstances. Negative thinking fades as treatment begins to take effect. In the meantime:

Set realistic goals in light of the depression and assume a reasonable amount of responsibility.
Break large tasks into small ones, set some priorities, and do what you can as you can.
Try to be with other people and to confide in someone; it is usually better than being alone and secretive.
Participate in activities that may make you feel better.
Mild exercise, going to a movie, a ballgame, or participating in religious, social, or other activities may help.
Expect your mood to improve gradually, not immediately. Feeling better takes time.
It is advisable to postpone important decisions until the depression has lifted. Before deciding to make a significant transition change jobs, get married or divorced discuss it with others who know you well and have a more objective view of your situation.
People rarely "snap out of" a depression. But they can feel a little better day-by-day.
Remember, positive thinking will replace the negative thinking that is part of the depression and will disappear as your depression responds to treatment.
Let your family and friends help you.
How Family and Friends Can Help the Depressed Person
The most important thing anyone can do for the depressed person is to help him or her get an appropriate diagnosis and treatment. This may involve encouraging the individual to stay with treatment until symptoms begin to abate (several weeks), or to seek different treatment if no improvement occurs. On occasion, it may require making an appointment and accompanying the depressed person to the doctor. It may also mean monitoring whether the depressed person is taking medication. The depressed person should be encouraged to obey the doctor's orders about the use of alcoholic products while on medication. The second most important thing is to offer emotional support. This involves understanding, patience, affection, and encouragement. Engage the depressed person in conversation and listen carefully. Do not disparage feelings expressed, but point out realities and offer hope. Do not ignore remarks about suicide. Report them to the depressed person's therapist. Invite the depressed person for walks, outings, to the movies, and other activities. Be gently insistent if your invitation is refused. Encourage participation in some activities that once gave pleasure, such as hobbies, sports, religious or cultural activities, but do not push the depressed person to undertake too much too soon. The depressed person needs diversion and company, but too many demands can increase feelings of failure.

Do not accuse the depressed person of faking illness or of laziness, or expect him or her "to snap out of it." Eventually, with treatment, most people do get better. Keep that in mind, and keep reassuring the depressed person that, with time and help, he or she will feel better.

WHERE TO GET HELP
If unsure where to go for help, check the Yellow Pages under "mental health," "health," "social services," "suicide prevention," "crisis intervention services," "hotlines," "hospitals," or "physicians" for phone numbers and addresses. In times of crisis, the emergency room doctor at a hospital may be able to provide temporary help for an emotional problem, and will be able to tell you where and how to get further help.

Listed below are the types of people and places that will make a referral to, or provide, diagnostic and treatment services.

Family doctors
Mental health specialists, such as psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, or mental health counselors
Health maintenance organizations
Community mental health centers
Hospital psychiatry departments and outpatient clinics
University- or medical school-affiliated programs
State hospital outpatient clinics
Family service, social agencies, or clergy
Private clinics and facilities
Employee assistance programs
Local medical and/or psychiatric societies

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